Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Messi Wants to Become 'Legend'

Is this anything like LeBron James telling reporters his goal is to be a "global icon"?

Well, yes, actually, it is.

Lionel Messi says he wants to be a "legend."

Interesting reality, from the perspective of a sports fan outside the United States:

Messi is more likely to succeed at his aspiration than is LBJ.

A fairly simple concept, really.

Basketball is America's No. 2 game. Except in those areas that prefer baseball. Then basketball is No. 3.

In many areas of the rest of the world, basketball is a fairly common No. 2 sport. Europe, where nearly every country has a pro league. Some parts of Africa. It might even be the No. 1 sport in, say, the Philippines.

But soccer? The game Messi plays?

If you're No.1 in soccer, you are really a global icon. And a legend, too. Soccer is the world's game, the clear No. 1 sport in the vast majority of the planet's countries.

Let's take a look at what Messi, a 22-year-old Argentina, already has done:

--His club team has won three Spanish League championships.

--His club team has won two European Champions League titles, and the Champions League victor generally is considered the best club team in the world.

--And just to reinforce that, Barcelona won the Fifa Club World Cup right here in Abu Dhabi, last December. With Messi playing the starring role.

--And, Messi is the 2009 Fifa player of the year.

Meanwhile ... LeBron James has won zero NBA titles. He has one MVP title.

LeBron may look like the greater athlete. He may act as if he is, and if he and Messi were competing in, say, the decathlon, LBJ probably wins. But in reality, he has to pick up the pace to catch Messi in "legend" status. Because he starts from so far behind him.

A soccer superstar is a household name just about anywhere in the world that isn't India.

A basketball superstar ... for him to replace soccer's best player in the minds of fans ... would take a very long run of over-the-top excellence. Not Most Valuable Puppet commercials. Lots of championships and MVP titles. Two or three huge Olympics performances. A starring role in several world championships. Which the would-be "global icon" hasn't managed yet.

Meanwhile, if Argentina and Lionel Messi win South Africa 2010, giving him a piece of every trophy there is to win in the world's most popular game ... it will be the unassuming little guy from Argentina who is the true global icon. And legend, too.
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Monday, March 22, 2010

Kiwis Don't Expect to be Whipping Boys

Well, sure. No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.

This story has been around for a few days now, "New Zealand can be competitive" ... and I have left it alone. But I now am in the mood to take on this sort of topic.

Like this:

Ha!

Ha-ha!

This is one of those bits of optimistic nonsense that invite sarcasm.

The man speaking here is Ryan Nelsen, New Zealand's captain ... a title which, in this case is like being named captain of the Titanic -- people are a bit more inclined to remember your part in this disaster. (The Titanic's captain was name Smith. I know that without looking it up. See?)

"We are competitive now," he said.

On the basis of what? Defeating Bahrain to gain the final berth into South Africa 2010? Bahrain. Winning a home-and-home with Bahrain means you can "compete" on the world stage?

Uh, no.

In the past, Cap'n Nelsen said, "we haven't had many goalscorers or too much experience but I think we've got quite a bit of that now."

Hmm. Well, let's check. Scroll to the lower half of this wiki entry and find the roster of New Zealand's players and see where they play. I'll wait. (Hmm-de-hum ...)

How many of the Kiwis play for a serious professional side? Well, Nelsen plays for Blackburn Rovers in the Premiership, and is captain there, as well. That's nice. But ... that's also about the end of "serious club football" players. Unless you count Major League Soccer, and not even Americans do.

As for all that All Whites scoring prowess and experience ... perhaps he's talking about matches for the Wellington Phoenix and Gold Coast United. Which will not, we dare say, prepare you for Italy or even Paraguay and Slovakia -- the other countries in the seriously weak Group F.

"We are going to be very competitive ..."

Well, yes, we expect you will show up and run around.

"And if some teams have a bad day and we have a good day, you never know ..."

If those teams having the bad day are Bahrain or perhaps New Caledonia ... but Paraguay on a bad day beats you 2-0.

"I think a lot of teams will underestimate us, and that's what we want."

Had nothing to do with what you want. You will be estimated accurately -- as the softest mark in the tournament.

If New Zealand scores, it's a good World Cup for the Kiwis. If it somehow manages some ugly 0-0 tie after bunkering in for 90 minutes ... it becomes a great World Cup for the All-Whites.

But that probably is too much to expect. This appears to be the most overmatched World Cup crew since the U.S. in 1990 ... or maybe Canada in 1986.

I would like New Zealand to get to South Africa and actually be competitive. I just don't see it happening.

We don't expect the Kiwis to say "we expect to get our heads handed to us three straight times out" ... but it might be better to leave it at, "We're going to play as hard as we can and see how it turns out."

Anything more than that is being not quite honest.
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Sunday, March 21, 2010

Argentina: So Good Diego Can't Screw It Up?

Ian Hawkey has an interesting piece today in the Johannesburg Times.

In it, he suggests that Argentina is a legitimate threat to win South Africa 2010. Not because of Diego Maradona, but in spite of him.

Hawkey suggests Argentina has so many elite scorers (only Brazil seems as gifted) ... that it will be hard to screw this up. Unless the back falls apart, and it could.

Among the names Diego can put on his lineup card:

--Lionel Messi. Perhaps the best player in the world, and a guy who appears to be in from, with five goals in his last two matches with Barcelona. Yikes. He leads the Spanish League in goals with 22.

--Then there is Gonzalo Higuain, who scored three goals of his own last Sunday and now has 19 goals.

--And Diego Milito of Inter Milan, second in Seria A scoring.

--And Carlos Tevez, who has 16 goals for Manchester City, a total exceeded by only three men in the Premiership.

--And Lucas Barrios, fourth in scoring in the Bundesliga.

He also mentions 21-year-old Sergio Aguero of Atletico Madrid (the father of Diego's grandchild), Javier Saviola of Benfica and Lyon forward Lisandro Lopez.

Most teams in the World Cup would be happy to have one of those guys. Ecstatic to have two of them.

Hawkey, like this writer, is less than enthralled with Coach Diego, describing him as "a former cocaine addict, tax evader and all-around rascal."

But Hawkey suggests Diego may have such trouble settling on who will play for him because, especially in the attack, he is "spoiled for choice" -- as the Brits say.

Certainly seems that way. How to get all those guys on the field?

A problem about 28 teams World Cup teams would love to have.
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Saturday, March 20, 2010

Fifa: No Worries about Next Meal

Sport? Or business?

With Fifa, sometimes it's hard to tell.

Soccer's world governing body announced a profit of $196 million for 2009, on revenue of $1.06 billion.

So if you've been worried about where Sepp Blatter's next four-star meal was coming from ... don't.

It strikes me that $196 million profit on revenues of $1.06 billion ... is nearly 20 percent profit. If one of the big oil companies reported a profit of 20 percent, people would go crazy.

So, why isn't Fifa pouring some of that money back into the sport? Maybe see if the group can get along on, oh, 10 percent profit for a year.

What could it do with the other $100 million from this year? Maybe buy soccer balls and distribute them in all those Third World countries where we read stories about guys kicking around a wad of paper. While they play barefoot.

Maybe open an academy in Africa and another in Central America. Perhaps infuse a little money into India, the last Black Hole on the soccer map. Where 1 billion people don't play soccer and don't care. Like, way, way more than Americans don't care.

What will Fifa do with the $196 million profit? Probably throw some lavish parties in Joburg. Give Sepp a raise. Buy him a gold-plated desk.

The rest ... they'll probably just waste.
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Friday, March 19, 2010

Fifa Slaps Down 'Unofficial National Carrier'

Fifa can be a little, oh, fascistic when it comes to defending its marketing rights.

The budget air-carrier Kulula has received a cease-and-desist letter from Fifa's Thought Police in regards to an advertising campaign, the Johannesburg Star reports.

Kulula's ads had identified it as the "Unofficial National Carrier of You-Know-What."

Apparently, using words which might make you think of South Africa 2010 makes Fifa angry. The campaign might seem clever to you or me, but to Fifa it is "ambush marketing."

The airline fired back at Boss Fifa in a tweet:

"Oh dear, letter from Fifa's lawyers says we broke their trademark of the use of 'South Africa' and think our non-WC ad was about soccer ...

"Even the use of our national flag was an issue. It's absolutely outrageous. We've signed over our country, its symbols and our economy to one Sepp Blatter. Nasty."

Sepp is Fifa's President for Life. (Or he behaves as if he is, anyway.) He and his drones are beyond zealous (maniacal?) in protecting the advertising exclusivity of its official partners because Fifa likes the money the partners kick into the kitty, and want to charge at least as much at Brazil 2014.

"They said we cannot depict the Cape Town stadium, we can't use soccer balls, or the word 'South Africa', and the depiction of the national flag is not allowed," said the Kulula marketing manager Nadine Damen.

"We can't make any reference to the World Cup. They also told us we cannot use the vuvuzela, which, in our view, is representative of the people of South Africa and their love of football."

The vuvuzela is the annoying plastic horn that has become the symbol, almost, of South African soccer fans. Didn't think you could own the intellectual rights to the big brother of a kazoo? In Fifa's world, apparently you can.
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Thursday, March 18, 2010

Becks Inspires Poet Laureate

This is almost camp, really. The poet laureate of Britain, Carol Ann Duffy, has written a poem about David Beckham and his ruptured Achilles tendon. No, really. The poet laureate. Of Britain. Has done a poem about Becks.

I'm not sure it will knock Alfred Lord Tennyson out of the British canon, but I bet it's the first time Britain's poet laureate has been moved to versify about a footballer.

And if they have, I doubt thoroughly that they released it first in, yes, the Daily Mirror, one of England's scandal sheets.

Anyway, here it is. Entitled, "Achilles (for David Beckham)" Read it and weep.

Myth's river — where his mother dipped him, fished him; a slippery golden boy flowed on, his name on its lips.

Without him, it was prophesied, they would not take Troy.

Women hid him, concealed him in girls' sarongs; days of sweetmeats, spices, silver songs ...

But when Odysseus came, with an athlete's build, a sword and a shield, he followed him to the battlefield, the crowd's roar,

And it was sport, not war, his charmed foot on the ball...

But then his heel, his heel, his heel ...


All-righty then!

Clearly, this is about the original Achilles. The inspiration, of course. The "not take Troy" part ... I suppose Troy is the World Cup. The bit about "concealed him in girls' sarongs" is about Becks' famous southeast Asian period when, yes, he did wear a sarong ... and the bit about "Spice" ... well, that's wife Victoria, one of the Spice Girls ... But who Odysseus was in this poem, "with an athlete's build" ... well, feel free to enlighten us on that one.

So, when is a Portuguese poet going to get busy on Cristiano Ronaldo?
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Wednesday, March 17, 2010

All the President's Wives

I know. I said I would leave South African politics behind. But so much is going on!

We've got Steven Pienaar saying he doesn't think England is all that hot, which is interesting because he plays for Everton in the Premier League -- and also is South Africa's best player. He likes Argentina, Brazil, Germany or Italy. Becks is devastated he can't play in the World Cup, but he may still have a role as a good-will ambassador. Beefy midfielder Kevin-Prince Boateng, who wants to play for Ghana in SA12010, hasn't been cleared by Fifa yet and may not make it; he was born in Germany and played for German youth teams in international competition, which used to mean you were stuck but that process is becoming, oh, elastic. And that's most of the pressing soccer news.

And now back to the soap opera that is the South African government.

The New York Times has noticed.

NYT correspondent Barry Bearak writes that the nation always has wondered how its leaders live so lavishly on modest salaries. And "lifestyle audits" are turning up big numbers. One of those being examined is the infamous Julius Malema. And Jacob Zuma, of course. Bearak notes which sort of BMW the humble public servants prefer.

We also have this piece in the Johannesburg Times about how the government gives president Jacob Zuma's wives more than $2 million a year (once we convert the total from Rand) to ... just do what they do. It wouldn't be so expensive if the country weren't supporting three Zuma wives. And some of his children, too.

Have we mentioned lately ... it's a mess down there?

Well, it is. What these guys do year in and year out would get a guy chucked out of office in most of the First World ... but everyone is just truckin' along, in SA.
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